Shyness can hold us back from achieving our best. It can be very helpful to understand what causes shyness so that we can work towards overcoming it.

Shyness is usually based on fear. You may have had bad experiences in the past, which caused you to shy away from speaking up and voicing your opinion. People can be very self-centred and often don’t consider or notice the effects they are having on others. You may have become over-sensitive, insecure and lack self confidence, as a result of this.

The response you get from others is usually based more so on their mood or something that is happening in their life at the time – it’s usually not you!

Confident people can brush off difficult encounters by telling themselves - ‘She must be having a bad day’ or ‘He’s not in a good mood today’ – whereas shy people think there must be something wrong with them for another person to treat them that way.

It might surprise you to know that other people have issues with insecurity and fear – most of us do.

Sometimes it’s the person who appears most confident, who actually has to work hard at convincing himself that he has a lot to contribute. People are not always as confident as they appear.

People want to get to know you, and interact with you, so do some things which will help you to open up and overcome your shyness.

A confident person can be quiet, and controlled when it’s necessary. Shyness is holding back and being timid whether it’s appropriate or not.

Stand in front of a mirror. Lift your diaphragm, hold your head high, look into your eyes and smile. Do this as often as possible, you’ll like what you see!

Let go of any bad experiences which may have caused your shyness.

Focus on the other person, not yourself. Think about making the other person feel comfortable, rather than how uncomfortable you feel.

Become genuinely interested in others. Ask people about themselves.

Don’t talk about yourself too much. Remember, you want to take your focus off yourself.

Think and speak positively. Make a conscious effort to become a positive person. Turn your thoughts around. Instead of – “I’m going to make a fool of myself” – think – “Everyone trips over their words now and then, it’s natural. If I do, I’ll just correct myself and carry on.”

Accept that you’re not perfect. None of us are. Appreciate and learn from others positive attributes.

Remember your good points, and what you have achieved, even the small things.

Take care with your appearance. We all feel more confident when we feel we look good.

Stay calm. Take a couple of deep breaths.

Speak up. On the phone and in person a receptionist needs to be heard and understood. Determine to do this, even when you don’t want to, and you’ll find that it will become easier and easier.